Hippo Godzilla

WHORE was stamped onto Chuck’s hand when he entered Waterworks Pub. He hoped that when he would see his partner tomorrow afternoon that he wouldn’t take offense. Tonight was the drag show, and the place was packed. He said a few words to the group of friends he came with, and they decided to split up. Chuck and Greg headed to the bar for a few drinks, while Cory and Rob went to grab the pool table while it was still open.

Cory looked at his watch, and was disgusted to be at the gay pub, but Rob had promised him free drinks if he came along. It was 11 p.m. Only one more hour before the show started. Cory was great at pool, and could even play it professionally. He focused on winning and less on the short man Rob was staring down in between shots.

With no surprise, Cory won the first game against Rob. At that point, Cory couldn’t ignore the flirting from a distance Rob was doing and started teasing him. Rob rolled his gay eyes and tucked his arm under his pit and said, “If you want to get rid of me, let me win a game so I can impress that little hunk-of-man.”

Cory agreed but wasn’t about to let Rob win easily. When it seemed that all was lost for Rob, Cory made a big mistake and hit the 8 ball in while there were still a few balls left. Rob’s new boy toy came over and took Rob to the bar for a drink.

Greg sat in the bar stool talking to Chuck all about a restaurant he planned on opening for the summer. The only problem was that Chuck was clearly getting wasted, and Greg felt that he was just pouring information into this person who wouldn’t remember a word of it the next day. Greg looked over at the pool table and saw that Rob was making friendly with a guy who was way too short for him. He rolled his eyes, and saw that Cory was on his way over.

Greg always felt that Rob was an embarrassment, and even though they owned multiple businesses together, he thought that he was a child. So when Cory or Chuck would come out partying with him, it dulled the pain of knowing a guy like Rob, especially since Greg wasn’t a drinker. Cory sat down next to the rest of the guys for a bit and started downing drinks. It was 11:45 p.m. 15 more minutes until the drag show began, and the sooner the better, Greg thought.  He sipped on a Coke and laughed at the rest of the drunken crowd.

Midnight arrived and a large semicircle formed around the stage. Rob was still with the new boy, and they talked excitedly about what they were going to see. The lights dimmed and a Broadway hit began playing.  The drag queen came out, and people were shocked.

Cory nudged his way over to Rob and said, “It’s a hippo Godzilla! Look, when it moves the floor starts shaking!”

After the next few acts, the DJ announced that they needed some more volunteers. Five gay men happily agreed to do it, and then Cory had an idea. He went up to the DJ and convinced him that he had a friend who would make a perfect drag queen.

Rob was enjoying a beer with his friend, when on the speakers he heard, “Rob, get ready for the drag show!” He looked at his friend and laughed, saying how bad he felt for that poor guy to get called up. Cory came over and started laughing and tugging on his shirt. He couldn’t understand what he was saying, and then it clicked.

“You little bitch,” Rob said with a disbelieving look on his face.

Rob climbed the stairs to the studio where men were becoming women. The drag queens already dressed looked awful with smeared makeup and lipstick. Then this person called Eve came over and tried showing him a few dance moves. Rob knew exactly how to handle this situation and said, “Bitch, please. I wasn’t born gay yesterday. I know Broadway!”

Cory and the guys anxiously waited by the stage for Rob to come out. Chuck supported Cory’s heroic decision in making Rob do drag. It was something that Rob always wanted to do but never had the courage for it.  They all got their phones out in preparation to take photos and video.

Rob felt fabulous. He had long blonde hair and wore a tight flowery pink dress and black high heels. He lip synced to Priscilla Queen of the Desert and put the dance moves Eve showed him to shame. He felt like the queen he always knew he was. During the climax of the song, he came off the stage among the crowd. They grabbed at him and stuffed money down his dress. He felt so hot. 

Written: 4 April 2012